THE CAVE PAINTING

This is like the past being resurrected.

Iam totally in the past.

And Iam at the same time in the present and it a little

uncomfortable.

Because it brings back many memories.

And it should bring back everything.

That is not good.

But it does have to be that way.

Even though I want to get rid of the past.

I can learn by my mistakes.

And hold on to what is good.

Everything I have written on this starwriter has been good.

And I began with writing with speaking.

And that was a terrific begining.

I proved I could write until I got distracted by something else.

And that is why I use the starwriter Iam not distracted.

I can take a memo about the days activities.

If I want to.

And it should always be that way.

I shouldn't have to write about every day.

And find something interesting in a boring day.

But I can do that and that what a writer does writes about his

day.

And of course a writer has something to write about.

And I have My Science Thesis.

And it will never be finished.

And maybe that should be the case that it not finished until the

fat lady sings.

I can always write another blog.

And maybe I won't bother.

But If Iam making progress why stop.

Maybe one day someone will read everything I have written and

continue my work.

And that would be pointless.

And there is always a point.

A point that they falied me because I was too clever and maybe I

wanted to get out of work.

And that is always the reason you are failed.

And sometims it is because you are too stupid.

But not in this case.

They failed me for having faith.

Faith in my work which they wanted to show was not good.

And that is obvious now.

That everybody hates my work.

That they never give credit where credit is due.

They are simply monsters that you would fear if you were young.

And people do fear them.

But I just give them as good as they get.

Because they never understand why I am not hurt.

Because they are certain their words hurt.

And people like that are unusual.At least they were.

But they seem to love the Hawking forum.

So there is something very bad about it.

Maybe it is Hawking himself he is not a christian.

And yet he pretends to believe.

For science sake.

And for religions sake he pretends not to believe.

So he really is a pretender.

And so the forum is a place where people pretend to be someone

else.

And Iam better off without it.

That is what I would say if I allowed it to go back to the way it

was.

They would find someone else to pick on.And maybe that is what I

need to see someone else in my shoes.

And to no longer allow these people to mess with me.

Because they are messing with my head.

And they really are pretending to be messing with my head.

Because they don't understand pschatry is meant to heal.

Whatever Tom Cruise might say they have healed me.

And they have helped when I needed help.

So I should not hate them.

They can't put the devil down as the cause it has be rational.

Like all science we can't put the devil down as the cause of

Einstein.

When he may be one of the factors.

Einsetin could never hold down a job and he could so chances are

he wasn't insane.

But that doesn't mean he got all his ideas from God.

His God was spinozas and that is just an evil spirit.

So you have got to watch out what your God is.

If it is Einstein it is spinozas God and it is a God of

contradiction.

And contradiction always is a sign of something missing.

There is something missing from Einsteins theory.

And he knew and was looking for it.

And Iam humble enough to say I have not found it.

But that Einstein has given me the clue.

What if my answer is just an misunderstanding.

Then it is my misunderstanding.

And it is a good one.

Because to misunderstand Einstein is to understand him.

I could write a hundred blogs and I could combine them all into

one.

And it would all be on one disc.

That is the beauty of this machine.

It is the ultimate in tools for writing.

There is nothing like this machine to make a blog.And a blog can

become a book.

But it is likely to remain a blog.

And there is no reason I can't learn to use the software.ANd if I

could I would but I can't so I won't.

It is way too expensive to hire someone to upload the book.

But maybe if I had the photos I could easily upload a new book.

So I will probably never put the book on LULU.

Because it just can work to put it on LULU.

Then it can be the longest book ever.

And it can be called MY RESEARCH.

1999-2008.

And that is a good title.

But no title is necessary for a blog.

It can just be BLOG CONTINUED.ANd BLOG A B C D E F G.

ANd it can be ALPHA NUMERICAL it can be blog A 1 A 2 A 3.

And that is perfect.

Because Iam always in search of the perfect title.

So Thomas's Blog A 1.

That is what I will call this Blog Richard Thomas Blog A1.

And if you have heard of an Einstein named Richard Thomas then I

have managed to shake my past.

And everyone should have the right to make a new start.

Wit a new name somewhere else that no one has ever heard of them.

And no one wants that.

And it is a great blessing to no longer fear what my name has

meant.

Because it has meant things to me that were not pleasant.

It has meant a fight to be accepted.

And a fight to not be rejected.

And all of that is in the past.

Because Iam Richard Thomas and Iam Johnboy the writer.

And I will always be a famous writer.

But no one will ever know who Iam.

And that is the way I like it.And that is the way everybody likes

it.When they know what fame is like.

It is awful.

To be well known.

And it really hard on those you love.

That is why I shall remain annonymous.

Because people want to hurt me with their words.

They know their words hurt.

And they know that Iam am reacting to their words.

Because they are looking for a reaction that means they have hurt

me.

And how crazy is that even a lunatic would not expect people to

be hurt by what they said.

And that is why Iam sane and they are not.

Because I don't set out to hurt people with my words I set out

tohelp them.

And If I fail I may hurt them badly.

And I know that.

And I seldom care.

But that is not the same as setting out to destroy others.

And it careless and being careless with words can hurt people a

lot.

No one is perfect in speech.

And Iam not.

My gifts are imperfect.

But If I continue to use them in faith Iam using what I have been

given to do good for all.

And the good of all means doing everything I can to help people.

But not to th extent that I give away my gift.

Because I need my tool to use my gift.

And a writer does not give away his tool.

Unless he is finished.

And that can always be the case for others but I will always have

something more to say like Asimov.

And Asimov has nothing more to say.

So Iam like him.

And Iam not I have plenty more where that came from.

The future is just one long book and I have to fill in hours and

hours when I have nothing to do.

That is because I don't work and I have choosen this lifestyle.

It is not bad to not work.

But you have to fill in a lot of time.

So there a lot of things I can be doing rather than sitting here

feeling sorry for myself.

I don't expect the blasphermers to understand to them their job

is their life.

Work is power and knowledge means work.

or information means work.

And they will succeed because satan helps them.

But I will succeed too because God helps me.

And he is helping me to be healed right now.

So that the guy I was becoming at Redcliffe will be the guy Iam

now.

Because I was taking all the right steps towards a new life.

But I had some very serious problems.

And they are going to be comletely taken care of.

And I will start my new life today.

Because isaac means new life.

And he means a new covenant.

And God has made a new covenant with me.

To be my special friend and never let anything come between us.

So it is back to the future.

And it is forwards to the future.

And if I really set ut to make progress on proving Einstein wrong

I really could prove him wrong.

And was not always true I didn't understand why he was wrong.

But now I do it is as simple as 2+2=4.

2+2=4 can't apply to the big bang but it does apply to creation

ex-nihilo.

And that is the test of rationality.

The law of non contradiction can't apply to the big bang.

And it can apply to creation ex-nihilo.

And it is very good.

People can argue endlessly about it.

And it will prove nothing in particular.

Because they will believe whatever they want to.

And they won't worry if the big bang doesn't make sense.

In fact to them a balanced equation always makes sense.

But Iam saying unbalanced equations like 2+2=4 are rational.

And the expression 1/3 APPLE+ 1/3 ORANGE+ 1/3 ORANGE= 1

APPLE/ORANGE is irrational.

Just like the big bang itslef all laws of physics break down.

And maybe not quantum mechanics.

And maybe even that.

It is another way of saying it can't happen just as an explosion.

There is more to it.

Then a big explosion.

But noone will ever doubt the third equation.

Because it just that kind of thing that makes me mad.

If someone comes up with something that does not make sense

everybody sais it is right.

But when you say add equations 2+2=4 evereybody sais it is wrong.

And that doesn't make any sense.

But it shows people are biased towards evolution.

They want the cosmos to evolve.

And that means it must change form.

So the idea of beginning with an opposite universe one that is

Godel suits evolution fine.

You get a non contradictory explosion because the big crunch is a

contradictory universe.

So that is the mechanism.

That is what people wanted of God to prove the Buddhist right and

make me one with everything.

And God just isn't one with everything.

The laws that apply to heaven don't apply on earth.

God may be three persons in one.

That does mean three equations that are different can be one.

And of course it does.

But six is mans number.

And seven is Gods number.

And put them together and you get 42.

And that is mans numbers and Gods numbers together.

And it is the worst possible thing.

And that is the way to understand it you cannot make anything in

Gods image.

Not even a theory.

And the big bang is a theory in Gods image.

And it must be incorrect or God would not have said ex-nihilo.

Because what went before was nothing.

And what went before the big bang must have been the big crunch..

If you can't decide then you are not alone.

Multitudes won't be able to decide between the two theories.

But that means they will keep an open mind to ex-nihilo.

And maybe that is better than deciding.

And teachers will teach the controversy and there is no sign of

that happening.

But maybe one day after Iam dead they will make me a saint.

At least in science.

And then everyone will learn my theories in school.

And that would be a good end except I wouldn't be there to see

it.

So that would not be so great.

But that is all the other great scientists got.

----- Original Message -----
From: Steve A Jeffrey
To: rouse@maths.ox.ac.uk
Sent: Tuesday, April 01, 2008 1:05 PM
Subject: ROGER


A way of proving the human brain chalk and a blackboard is superior to a computer mathematica.
Or a supercomputer.